The loneliness epidemic has not only affected people looking for love, but also long-lasting friendships. More often than not, people are struggling to find like-minded individuals to create healthy companionship, not only due to the rise of ‘it being awkward’ or people being shy to put themselves out there..
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..however most people have been let down in the past, they don’t want to go through the pain again and people are struggling to trust others due to the jealousy epidemic. Today I want to talk about the jealousy epidemic, how to make long-lasting beautiful friendships, the difference between friends and best friends, the benefits of having good people around you and most importantly.. how to be a good friend yourself.
ultimately, the only way to make good friends is to become a good friend yourself; good people gather around other good people.
I feel a good place to start is friendships and why do we even need them at all? Surveys say 1 in 10 adults have no close friends. This is a huge amount of people who run the risk of having severe mental health issues, again, circling back to the loneliness epidemic.
‘’University of Oxford’s Green Templeton College, said: “Loneliness and social isolation are deeply intertwined with mental and physical health. Studies show loneliness increases the risk of depression, and depression in turn increases loneliness.’’
benefits of having good friends!
- Living longer & healthier life
We as humans need to socialise, we have evolved to form and maintain emotional connections, therefore, loneliness and social isolation affects mood and can cause anti-social behaviours. Studies show that people with stronger social bonds have 50% higher likelihood to survive than those with fewer social connections.
- Relieve emotional pain
Providing a safe space to reduce stress and anxiety, offering comfort and empathy can help each other during difficult times; feeling supported by those around you can greatly increase happiness hormones due to the mind feeling at ease in a trusted environment. Equating to a peaceful mind.
‘’Peace of mind is not attained by ignoring problems but by solving them’’
- Promotion of personal growth
Surrounding yourself with people who want you to succeed is the best thing you could do for yourself, within friendships it’s so easy to get influenced and peer pressured into things you don’t like or don’t want to do.. Surrounding yourself with supportive people who really want the best for you will push your self growth automatically; think of 5 people youre most close with.. Or would like to be close with, you as a person are a small part of each friend, you mimic those who are close to you and those who you look up to, make sure you’re surrounding yourself with good people who you want to be like.
- Fun and enjoyment
Believe it or not, having fun is super important! There are many health benefits to letting loose and being wild with your friends, long term effects lowers the risk of chronic diseases, such as heart disease and stroke, it can lead to improved sleep quality; lower stress levels and positive mood contributes to better sleep, it lowers cortisol levels, enhances creativity and cognitive functions etc.. etc.. Those who prioritise fun and leisure activities live longer and more enjoyable lives!- young and free forever ❤
the jealous epidemic
While these are all known benefits, people still seem to struggle with finding good connections with genuine people due to the jealousy epidemic.. What is jealousy? and why does it affect so many people today?
‘Jealousy is feeling or showing envious resentment of someone or their achievements, possessions or perceived advantages’
unfortunately 30% of people, in the uk alone, have admitted that they generally feel jealous and struggle with managing that feeling, causing rage, anger and ruining their close friendships. People are usually quiet about their jealous feelings, end up bottling up their emotions and sabotaging themselves or others as a reflection of their negative infatuation. In these situations someone is always going to end up hurt, either you or themselves. One of the first things that you need to understand about people with the ‘jealous disease’ is that they are deeply insecure, the only way they can work through that is with themselves, Otherwise why would they have to feel the way they do? The only way to handle these types of people is with sympathy; you can only feel sorry for the fucker. They may have hurt you, said and done things to you that are irreversible, with time you will heal, you’ll find good people. However, this person won’t. They’ll eventually ruin their relationships due to their toxic behaviour. hold your head high, good things are coming for you, thank god that person isn’t in your life anymore and just think- ‘what a sad life that person will live, I wish them the best’ and move on babe. The longer you hold onto the rage and anger they caused you the uglier you will get.. Just the way it is, as women we thrive on love and happiness, don’t let a dumb bitch dim your sparkle.
So with this being said, why does it affect so many people? The blunt answer is.. Someone is always doing better than you; this also means someone is also doing worse than you. It’s just the way this fucked up world works. You have the power within yourself to take control of your life and change those things you feel you lack or have too much of, get a move on and change your life; as far as we are promised, we only have one, Fucking use it. Every single person has different problems, we all tackle them in different ways, there’s no reason to be jealous of others, as their life is shit in a different way to yours. No one has time to wish they were someone else, reinvent yourself, what kind of person do you want to be and make it happen, there are steps to take to create a unique identity, just ALWAYS make sure you are 100% being you. Don’t try to be something you’re not. You have a super power that no one else does..
you’re you, No one else; Take advantage of the power you possess.
Ideally you want to avoid these people like the plague, they can cloud your judgement not only on other people but most importantly yourself. Therefore it’s necessary to distinguish between friends and people who pray for your downfall.. How do we find loyal friends? Where do we even start?
How to find genuine long-lasting friendships?
Most people find their lifelong friends from early ages, whether that’s from nursery, primary school or secondary school.. And most of the time people don’t even remember how they became friends.. One day it just kind of happened and you were inseparable. Some people struggled when they were children to connect to their peers and didn’t get that experience, some people lost their friends due to lifestyle differences or toxic behaviour; causing pressure of needing to find friends in their adulthood; why is it so hard to find connections in adulthood? And where would I be able to find others around me? Simple answer.. putting yourself out there..
Human connection is created through communication, putting yourself into situations to talk to others is simply the only way to do so. Think about all the things you love to do; hobbies such as painting, drawing, dancing etc. your favorite places to be, concerts, cafes, parties, different clubs and classes. Could be simply where you are working or studying, be the person to go up to someone first and create a conversation.. Also, not every single person needs to be your best, besties; people can just be ‘mates’ ‘friends’ ‘colleagues’ and with time naturally they will become your favourite people and you’ll be inseparable. Don’t be shy, be the first push, take control of the situation and be a friendly face to people around you.
Last but not least… How to be a good friend yourself?
Now we’ve been through all the different stages of friendship together, understanding; why do we even need friends, the benefits of having lovely people around us, jealousy in 2025 and how that can affect us and others.. It’s time to talk about how WE can be better friends and the positive change that can have on people we love.
Being a good friend means being there, even if it’s putting your own feelings to the side, sometimes you need to be selfless and support those around you and they should do the same for you. In times of need; making them a priority, checking up on your friends, making plans, messaging or calling first, etc.. These are bare-minimum friendship requirements and should be done on both ends. However; people forget the most important parts of being a good friend, that is accountability, apologies and appreciation.
Its all well and good that you are kind and lovely to everyone around you, however, when it comes down to it, life isnt fucking fairy tales and butterflies.. People make mistakes and that’s NORMAL.. You just need to understand that some people say things in the moment, anger, upset.. Even jealousy takes over, as long as you take that accountability and make that positive change, that’s the number one most valuable thing a person can do.
Apologising without change is manipulation.
stop being stubborn; once you realise you made a mistake and you are wrong; just say so. It doesn’t make you ‘cooler’ or most importantly ‘correct’, just because you avoid the conversation or argue your case harder to hopefully ‘get your way’ you have toxic behaviour. you need to work on that within yourself, do you need to be right? What’s the end goal here? You’re creating clashes within your friendships.. ?? Why? Say sorry and mean it. Realise your mistake and be a better person, it’ll change the course of your friendships, it’ll deepen your connections and allow personal growth for you all.
Last and certainly least…. (this has taken me 2 weeks to write.. Life has been crazy)
Appreciation. Love your friends. Tell them, they want to hear it and I know you want to hear it too. I can’t imagine the kind of things you’ve been through together, tell them how incredible they are and thank them for being them. There is nobody else like your best friend. Hold them close, some people don’t get to.. Then it’s too late, you grow apart, life changes, things become different. Hold your loved ones before they are gone. I wish I could.
thank you x
Thank you so much for reading and getting this far, I’m so sorry about the huge delay on this blog post but you’ll know everything going on soon enough I promise. I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I loved researching and learning more about the incredible connections we make and I hope you learned something or I helped you in some way. Thank you again and I’ll see you soon. Please like and subscribe so you don’t miss out on future posts ❤
”sometimes having fun with your best friend is the therapy you need”
lots of love; love.
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